My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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