He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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