I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
