Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Randomize
