I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize