Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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