i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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