Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
