areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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