I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Randomize
