dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
