we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
