dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize