Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.

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  (703): Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U. http://tfl.nu/bimg
  Replies (5) Good night (923) Bad night (542)
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  (585): View more from New York

  broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.

  (716): View more from New York

  you're writing country songs now?

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  (585): broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me. (716): you're writing country songs now? http://tfl.nu/hdm9
  Replies (32) Good night (1963) Bad night (6764)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget

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  (231): i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget http://tfl.nu/6lyk
  Replies (15) Good night (1167) Bad night (5756)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.

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  (908): there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time (732): no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution. http://tfl.nu/6mq6
  Replies (23) Good night (8843) Bad night (1346)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang

  (917): View more from New York City

  really making moves this morning i see

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  (202): just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang (917): really making moves this morning i see http://tfl.nu/4n5c
  Replies (15) Good night (4923) Bad night (1798)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.

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  (717): James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks. http://tfl.nu/8rn4
  Replies (17) Good night (5928) Bad night (1049)
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  (914): View more from New York

  something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..

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  (914): something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined.. http://tfl.nu/wloj
  Replies (13) Good night (921) Bad night (5075)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.

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  (908): You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room. http://tfl.nu/48yw
  Replies (6) Good night (3848) Bad night (1168)
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  (310): View more from California

  we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.

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  (310): we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former. http://tfl.nu/kzo5
  Replies (1) Good night (1583) Bad night (786)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?

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  (201): Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight? http://tfl.nu/of56
  Replies (30) Good night (7165) Bad night (963)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear

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  (416): Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear http://tfl.nu/hv34
  Replies (3) Good night (773) Bad night (571)
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  (347): View more from New York

  WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA

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  (347): WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA http://tfl.nu/6u80
  Replies (5) Good night (1028) Bad night (554)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.

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  (206): Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it. http://tfl.nu/gln0
  Replies (3) Good night (1514) Bad night (581)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat

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  (917): I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat http://tfl.nu/s2vr
  Replies (4) Good night (746) Bad night (296)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.

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  (928): I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor. http://tfl.nu/utrl
  Replies (3) Good night (256) Bad night (86)

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