youre lurking in front of me
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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