Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
