Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
