She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
How external is "for external use only"?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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