omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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