It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
is that a dick in a sweater?
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