Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
When are your genitals available?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
