the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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