Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
