i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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