Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
