didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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