He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
