Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
The feeling are messing with the penis
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize