Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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