yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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