I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I am in a vortex of obligation.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
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