I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
