I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
it's great music for shaving your balls
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
