it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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