it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
found the other keg... it's in the tree
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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