Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
