mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
