Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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