How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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