I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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