You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Randomize
