My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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