i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
