Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize