He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize