Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize