Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(213): View more from California

The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.

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(206): View more from Washington

would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?

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(804): View more from Virginia

Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?

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(860): View more from Connecticut

It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.

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29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Read it at the TFLN blog
(661): View more from California

The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.

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(216): View more from Ohio

Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight

(440): View more from Ohio

Challenge Accepted

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(207): View more from Maine

Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped

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