I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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