she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Who died my cat blue again?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize