what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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